Photo by saeed karimi on Unsplash
Shut up! Listening to other people is important!
How important? Well, according to Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic - how well and frequently you listen to others is a better predictor of your leadership potential than your actual intelligence or personality.
High quality listening is a rare commodity, though. That phrase, 'they like the sound of their own voice' is a thing.
Most* people are thinking about what they want to say next and not listening fully (*btw I have no research-based evidence for writing 'most' beyond that it feels right). I can see it in their body language.
This is human nature, I guess. Most* people are egocentric. In this modern world within which we work and live, we are often told to 'back ourselves', to express our inner voice, which results in being the centre of attention. That means a talk fest which often results in blather.
Most* people don't seem to be able to resist the temptation to talk. That inner voice gets frustrated and the mouth opens. When that happens amongst a crowd, there is often no place for listeners.
Okay, so what can be done about this?
Tomas' four enablers of high-quality listening bears repeating:
- Focus (give your undivided attention)
- Empathy (be open and considerate)
- Self-control (wait for the other person to finish)
- Inclusion (include the other person in your story)
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